18 Years
by Inexplicable Cat
Summary: It's Kenny's eighteenth birthday and these are his thoughts  and my own!  on his friends, his life so far, on his dreams and desires...


18 years.

18 years, living on this crazy planet, in this frustrating country and in this ''quiet little mountain town''.

Little...yes, mountain...ok.

But quiet?

No fucking way!

18 years, trying desperately to survive, associating with the same trash every day, fucking everything with a hole, dying over and over again and for what?

Have I become wiser?

Have I found happiness?

Have I stopped having frozen fucking waffles for dinner?

NO!

These 18 years that I've walked the face of the earth have been a complete waste of time.

God's and mine.

Fuck! Maybe I should stop complaining.

It is after all my birthday and I'm in my goddamn birthday party the guys threw for me.

The guys...

They sure have changed a lot through the years and somehow have managed to remain the fucking same.

Stan Marsh...Stan the Man.

He is sitting right next to me on the couch (we are in his house cause mine is the biggest dump in South Park) having his fifth, no wait, his** seventh** glass of vodka, looking totally wasted.

His arm is resting on my shoulders and he is whispering some shit to me about how happy he is for me turning 18, and there is a completely stupid grin on his face...

God I hate him!

Of all the douchebags in South Park I hate this fucking goth-emo wannabe, star quarterback, pussy jock the most! And he is supposed to be one of my two best friends (Cartman is not included of course.)

But I still hate his guts!

Why?

Well, that's another story...

I should first finish my description of the ''MARSHmellow'' here, before I get into that.

Let's see...I have to admit that Stan is pretty hot.

He is quite tall, almost as me, I'm three or four inches taller, I guess.

His body is big, strong and muscular, after all those years of having been the captain of the football team, his shoulders are wide and there isn't a hint of fat in his athlete-like body.

The only person that is a bit more muscular than Stan would be Craig, the other star of the football team. But Craig is also taller, in fact he is the tallest guy around.

Anyway back to Stan, his raven black hair is a bit longer now and they fall over his cobalt blue eyes, sometimes covering the left one in an emo way.

Stan isn't in fact emo, that wouldn't fit with his popularity from being the ultimate jock.

But he sure enjoys dressing like one, mostly black or dark gray clothes, metal bands t-shirts, black skinny torn jeans with chains and shit like that, that make him look even hotter.

I would love to get in his pants, really I would!...

But that's not why I hate him, rejection and stuff, no, but as I said that's another story...

Well, Stan had been dating Wendy since third grade but they broke up (for good this time) in our first year of high school.

Apparently this had something to do with Stan being totally gay for our other best friend. Since I fucked Wendy two days after their break up, she confessed to me that Stan had been completely cold around her and the pathetic loser couldn't even get a boner with her.

I fucked her brains out that night and a couple of nights after that, until she couldn't even remember who Stan was anymore!

Stan has been single since.

He could get any girl he wanted but he, instead, has the hots for a certain redhead little Jew.

And THAT'S why I hate him!

He is so fucking obvious for chrissake! And yet it seems, I'm the only one around who notices that.

God! he should come out already, hook up with him and live happily ever after like the perfect fucking individuals that they are.

But I guess I shouldn't wish for that, cause it might come true and then...

Anyway, at my left is my almost regular bitch, Butters, holding my arm tightly.

We are not together or anything, I've just fucked him in every way possible and I occasionally hang out with him.

He is very feminine and tiny and usually wears pink or light blue clothes with Hello Kitty stamps.

He is the ultimate fag...

That's why I like him, he is really pretty.

But I doubt I can feel anything but a sexual attraction towards him.

I don't think he can either and frankly I don't give a shit. He probably is in love with the fatass (and I can't possibly fathom why) but the asshole doesn't give a damn about him, except for when he uses him for his devious plans.

He is currently standing across the room with a bottle of vodka on one hand and a burger on the other.

That fucking fatass!

He too has changed much, he is a bit shorter than Stan and me but still very tall and god is he huge!

After years of playing hockey a lot of his body fat has turned to muscles and that makes him quite attractive, those chocolate brown eyes of his add to the whole picture.

He remains a manipulative son of bitch but at least he is not as mean and evil as he used to.

As I've said, he completely doesn't give a damn about Butters feelings and he is always bragging about his occasional fucks but I've got the feeling that he shares the same ''problem'' with Stan, or maybe I'm too suspicious.

Anyway, my gaze falls now to everyone's favorite couple!

Well, prepare yourselves ladies and gentlemen for the ultimate badass, bird flipper and his bitch, the super cute coffee addict , twitchy spaz!

Yeap, it's Craig and Tweek alright. The ebony haired boy is sitting in an armchair, the blond in his lap, as they are totally sucking each others face (God! that's HOT!)

They came out as a couple a few months ago, on Clyde's party and they've been inseparable ever since, not that before they weren't...

But now...Now it seems that Craig's arm is attached to Tweek's shoulders almost **all** the fucking time, to the point that they are beginning to resemble a freaky two headed creature or something!

It's kinda funny actually, South Park's toughest ''don't fuck with me'' guy, who is completely emotionless and apathetic most of the time, utterly melting over his little blond.

Can't say I blame him though. Tweek is just adorable! The way he shakes and twitches all the time, and that constant look of his, that scared, ''they are all out to get me'' look in his hazel eyes...

Oh, you just wanna put your arms around him and protect him from everything nasty out there...

And Craig is more than happy to oblige, he has already beaten the shit out of a couple of bullies, who dared to mess with his precious blond, hell he almost did that to me too but for different reasons...

You see, for a while I thought I had a little crush on the jittery caffeine addict, that had been before he ended up with Craig, so I tried to...you know, seduce him.

I was so confident that I could even fall in love with him and in that way I could find some kind of comfort and stop tormenting myself.

But as I said, Craig had other plans. I **was** a little pissed but Tweek is obviously happy with the asshole so I don't want to ruin that for him.

Besides even if he had ended up with **me, **instead, he would still have been only the best next thing...

Ah, the booze is finally getting to me, I scan the room once more but I don't find what or to be more accurate **who** I want, but instead my eyes land on Token and Clyde, who are sharing some coke.

That rich son of a bitch must have brought it, he is, after all, the only one who can afford it.

Fuck! I could use some of that shit right now.

Perhaps I should describe these two first.

Well, there's not much to say actually...

Token is still very rich, very clever and charming.

Clyde is an arrogant dumb fuck who thinks he can get any girl he wants and doesn't realize they all just use him for shoes. He is a horny bastard but not as much as **I** am...

And then, there is me! Kenneth ''Whitetrash'' McCormick! The biggest pervert, sex maniac, manwhore this town has ever seen.

I have already fucked every girl in South Park, some more than once, and even few of the guys.

It's not that I even try.

As odd as it may sound, I'm usually being hit on .

It seems that they all want a piece of me, the sex god himself.

And I'm definitely a people pleaser.

On our first year of high school, the girls made another list and of course I was on top.

Can't say I blame them (Hey I'm not fucking bragging here!)

I really look like a fucking angel.

I'm quite tall and my body is well built and with muscles in all the right places, it's not as muscular as Craig's or even Stan's but still it's flawless, and I think the ladies prefer it that way.

I look more vulnerable than my dark haired friends and that drives them crazy, I guess.

My messy honey blonde hair and my cerulean blue eyes add to the whole picture.

That's me.

And I can't offer to the world anything but myself.

Take it or leave it...

Well that's it.

South Park's pride and joy...

Each and every one of us.

…...

I know.

I **know.**..

There is something missing.

There is **someone** missing.

But I really don't have any words to describe him.

I mean c'mon...How can you describe perfection?

Because that's what he is.

Perfect.

They say I **look** like an angel.

But he actually** is** one.

My angel.

And I'm completely, utterly, desperately, deeply, **madly **in love with him!

I adore him.

He is the first person I think when I wake up and the last one before I fall asleep.

When I'm with other people, I think of him.

When I kiss other people, I think of him.

When I fuck other people, I feel pity for myself...and I think of him.

He is the reason I refuse to die.

He is the reason I always come back.

He makes life worth living.

Even if I'm a no good whitetrash son of a bitch.

Even if my dad beats me up sometimes till I faint.

Even if I already have sold myself out to every willing person to pay the price.

Even if no one actually gives a shit about me.

Even if nobody has ever shed a tear for me.

He has...

And that's **all **that matters.

Kyle Broflovski.

What could I say about him?

How could I possibly describe him?

How could I picture his amazing red locks that shine like rubies in the sun?

How could I find words for the pure beauty that his emerald eyes are?

And I love him.

But I couldn't ever **dare** to let him know.

How could I possibly claim him?

How could I possibly deserve to have him?

How could my filthy hands touch something so pure and innocent and corrupt its perfection?

I'm nothing.

I'm nobody.

I'm a poor trash.

I'm the biggest whore, I sell myself on the streets, although I try not to anymore because **he **thinks I'm selling my soul along with my body.

I don't think he has ever made love.

When I almost died for real, many years ago, he was the only one who cared.

He was the only one who was sad.

He was the only one who cried.

He was the one who saved me.

He **is **the only one who really cares about me, not my parents, not my ''friends'', just him.

He **is** the only one who cries when I die, every single time.

He **is** the one who saves me.

Every fucking day.

I would give my life for him.

That's probably not a big deal coming from **me**.

But I mean I would** really** give my life, I would never come back if it was for his own good.

I love him.

I've always loved him.

Ever since I can remember myself.

And maybe...

Maybe someday he'll love me back.

And save me again.

From myself.


End file.
